Get Over Love Rejection By Finding New Love
While contrary to conventional wisdom, experience shows that one potent antidote for the hurt of a love rejection, is to find a new love. Finding acceptance from someone new fills in the acceptance lost due to our vacated ex lover. So try just once to get over rejection from a lover by finding a new true love. You’ll be pleasantly surprised to find that this really works so long as you pick the new lover wisely.
A departing lover, when we’re not ready for them to go, leaves a very deep and empty spot in the soul that only a better lover can fill. You’ve heard the Gene Pitney song: Only love can break a heart? Well, it’s true that our hearts will only mend fully when a new love comes into our lives.
Avoiding dating for a year or more, as we’re often advised to do, opens us up to needlessly prolonged sadness and aloneness; a form of self-inflicted torture that in my opinion, is largely unnecessary. Relief for a love rejection by spending twelve months without romantic love comes way too slowly. In fact, after the year elapse, we may still hurt for our ex. Besides, waiting around is generally costly as well. People spend lots of money on therapy, alcohol, and activities that they don’t really like but do anyway to take their minds off of the hurt. Living without love for a year when what we most need is love, is counter intuitive. How can further depriving ourselves of love for a year help? When someone we deem to be a perfect 10 possibility holds our hand, it doesn’t matter if at first we’re still in love with the lover who rejected us because soon, we’ll fall in love with the new person, and the old will become more insignificant with each passing day.
Not just anyone will do to best help us get over rejection from an ex sweetheart. Most of the problems associated with dating new lovers too soon, do not actually come directly from allowing an insufficient period of time to mourn the old relationship before starting a new one. They happen frequently because the people we pick are just substitutes, but not truly ideal replacements for the lost love. Yet these substitutes are better than nothing because being with them feels a thousand times better than feeling the walls crushing in on us as we sit, alone each night, in our living rooms.
Intense loneliness hurts and can lead to desperation, and desperation can lead us to making poor selections of new lovers. So it does often occur that to quell the pain of love rejection, we compromise our standards and choose friends-with-benefits, or just friends, to keep company with. While we may feel relief through making small talk with them, this is only because they distract us. But these well-meaning folks do not fill up the real emptiness left by our most recent, previous lover.
But if we find new love in someone at least as remarkably beautiful in spirit, mind, and body as our last lover, then in just a short number of weeks, they’ll enable us to forget the love we lost and focus on the love we’re gaining. In fact, the love we’re getting is more immediate, untainted by history of love rejection or other baggage (especially if the new lover is a stranger), and falling in love again makes us feel very good. Feeling good is preferable to feeling lonely and lousy. New love heals newly lonely people from their ex love most effectively. We need not remain alone in order to get over love rejection.
Thus I’m convinced that the only true way to get over rejection in love is to find acceptance in an equivalent but different lover. The amount of time between the old and new doesn’t matter so much as long as the new is of equal or better caliber than the old. In my experience, I’ve found no quicker or more complete way to erase the pain of an ex lover leaving us, than to quickly fall in love with someone new.
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Tags: Dealing With Rejection, Love Is Happiness, Love Lonely